The man under the helmet.

One day I was at "Møllers bil" here in Sala and put a stickers with my teams logo on my teammates cars.
I wasn't at that best mood that day. Emotions was high up like waves and next moment it 's calm again.

That's the day you miss the family most of all. Miss the dad and sisters in homeland, miss the oldest sister and a cat. Miss the hug from your siblings and mostly from you mam. Like a child I want to run into hers paws and cry on her's chest while she cuddles me and palms away the tears and I listen to hers soft voice like a melody while she says words: everything is going to be fine, sweetheart. Be strong.
It's 8 years from now she is in England. It's 6th year I am away from my family. Facing the life alone, fighting the small battles, making new connections, surviving in business world, get hurt and fall in love again, making mistakes and choosing the right things to do, making the difference, falling down and getting up, falling down and getting up again.

People recognize me as a goalkeeper. That's what I am good at. Latvian National Team's goalkeeper and Salas new goalie. It's like my cover or "suit" every day or a sticker on my forehead- Da goalie. The girl under the helmet. Not complaining just facing the fact.


I put the stickers on my teammates cars.
Goalies are like a casual cars, players are the cars- cabriolet, because they don't wear the helmet, so they don't have a roof.( Ha! They don't have a roof! )
Goalie put the helmet on and cover all the face, hides behind the windows, under the roof, no one can see their true emotions under the helmet, it's hidden while players face is showed in all magazines and in public from the seat they are sitting. You may say (as a player) than we (goalies) are just full of fear that's why we wear helmet, but no. We wear helmet's because it's painful to get the shoot in face, just you know :) .

I don't say than players don't have an emotions. They surely dodely do.

I like helmets. I like to be a goalie. I like to hide. Like to hide that girl which only few have seen and have been sitting in the same car as I am. Close, in front seat beside me and get known the "essence" I am made of.
To hide that sincere, tender, fragile, crystal-pure girl which's inside of me. Inside of everyone. Everyone.

#99